Vol. 1, Post #34 Fuck It Fall Fashion

I'm in JENNY this week! My ongoing sex tips for girls* (*girls who are holding on to mid-life by a thread). A modern dating odyssey for Young Olds, AKA, people with readers.

Happy Thursday, Dear Readers!

As mentioned, I like to publish on Wednesdays and if you’re a subscriber to this Substack, you also know I hate to inundate you with a lot of bullshit emails, so since I knew I had a piece in JENNY this week, I delayed my weekly post until it ran.

Wait, what, Abbe? You’re writing about fashion? I’m here for the dating and love chat. Who cares about cashmere sweaters? Well, my darling Young Olds, one cannot exist on fuckfests alone, and this piece is sort of a cherry on the sundae in my year of just letting a lot of things go, not just clothing.

Like that sickly sweet cough syrup we endured as kids, 2024 has been an overflowing tablespoon dose of Letting Go. I left a love relationship that had gotten completely out of whack in its dysfunction, me doing all the heavy lifting and him doing all the things he promised he’d stop doing when he got stressed out. I had been, as my former usual default (emphasis on the word “FORMER”), willing to overcompensate for someone who was healing, even when it did not work for me. When even that failed, I just flailed…until I realized, nope, this is not for me.

I let go of a friendship that had, similarly, gotten one-sided. I felt not only not seen by this person who I used to lean on, and vice versa, but even worse, JUDGED when I expressed concern on how the friendship had veered off course. When I sent my “Dear John” email to this person, I intended to leave space to revisit the friendship in the future. What happened next is that I realized there was no future. Things had been said for which I was owed an apology and it seemed like if I was to receive one, it would come under the guise of “Sorry I hurt your feelings but I think…” and I realized that I didn’t want that apology, the one with a caveat. I wanted a simple, owned up apology. So nope, this is not for me. Related, I let go of another lesser friendship that had gotten really poisonous, TBH, but still needed to vaguely function because of a project we both founded. With this, after a brief attempt to offer up a working solution relationship, I realized I actually deeply distrusted this person, so why even attempt to work it out for…work? Again, nope, this is not for me.

I’ve had some Come To Jesus conversations with clients over this past year about wrapping up work that no longer seemed to have any real “steam” and how, for me, there was no proverbial flouncing out of the proverbial room, but simply a need to accept that we were not on the same page and just move on.

And finally — and I hope you’re doing the same in this capacity — I learned via the war in the Middle East/the humanitarian crisis in Israel and Gaza along with the ongoing botched abortion that is US politics and this election cycle, that the temptation to get into fights on social media about any and all of that is just a waste of time. Along those lines, sparring about ANYTHING on social media or, for that matter, via texting, is an impersonal and frankly bullshit way to communicate, so if something goes awry in any kind of digital communication in my world, I pick up the damn phone. That’s so Young Old on my part, but I’m not going to keep typing away when a call would clear the air or put a cap on things.

Putting a cap on things is just as good as clearing the air these days. Life is short and Mama ain’t got time for a lot of this^^^.

All that being said, you can see why cleaning out my closet and writing this piece for JENNY resonated with me, right?

Now…back to MUCH more upbeat bits and bobs. HERE IS WHAT MADE ME VERY HAPPY THIS PAST WEEK, because of you!

I can up the number of people who reached out to me and told me they were enjoying new vibrators to a total of 9 readers who related to my post — including a reader in her 70s who told me she just bought her first vibrator after reading my Substack. DO YOU SEE THE CONFETTI COMING OUT OF MY ASS!??!?!?!?

I got pinged by one of the dating coaches that I’ve referenced here about a possible collaboration. Who says Instagram is a time suck? Well…

This was another piece that I wrote for JENNY a few months ago, on reading tarot cards. Vogue reported that reading tarot cards is among the newest “wellness” practices that people are turning to these days. Whether that’s the case or not, I’ve honed my own practice mightily after studying tarot intently this year. My intuition is at an all-time high and I feel VERY connected to myself as a result of this. Last month, I offered up on social media that I’d be happy to do a Zoom or in-person tarot reading for anyone who wants one, in exchange for a $50 or more donation to the Harris Walz campaign. To date, I’ve now done 31 readings and almost everyone I’ve read for has donated far more than just my minimum, so if you, Dear Readers, want to pull cards with me in the name of democracy, just ping me at whatsshovegottodowithit@gmail.com and we can set up a date!

I love you all so much for reading along. Next week, should we talk about lubrication? I think we should! Mwah, mwah, mwah!