Yes I know you wanna fuck Aubrey Plaza. Beyond that. My ongoing sex tips for girls* (*girls who are holding on to mid-life by a thread). A dating odyssey for Young Olds, AKA, people with readers.
Always thankful for you and your perspective, Abbe. I’ve thought of this a zillion times. I was so poorly parented and had no one to give me good advice. I’ve reparented myself in therapy and after, helping those Denises with accepting her decisions. Off the bat, I wouldn’t have married my first BB at 23. That seven year relationship really wrought not much joy or pain in any real way (although he brought me a Tribe when I needed one, he being just a few years on the mainland from Hawaii), but kept me from dating ages 20-27, which I desperately needed to do and was afraid to do it. My second marriage was extremely painful emotionally (neither were good sex), but I got to live in London twice, had deep financial resources and privilege, and got two amazing sons, ergo Worth It. The rest of the men? My Big Love, whom I never married but still loves me today? He’s a shitshow I still adore (and saw in September for the second time in 13 years since we broke up, AGAIN), but he’s been so instrumental. We both expressed sadness at not being together at this stage of life (I met him in 8th grade, and he stated “I’m going to marry you one day.”). I guess I’m similar to you. Some of the heartache was what I needed, some were just detritus I should have skipped. But I landed here, where I’m comfortable and secure and happy and independent and retired. It worked out. 🥰
Always thankful for you and your perspective, Abbe. I’ve thought of this a zillion times. I was so poorly parented and had no one to give me good advice. I’ve reparented myself in therapy and after, helping those Denises with accepting her decisions. Off the bat, I wouldn’t have married my first BB at 23. That seven year relationship really wrought not much joy or pain in any real way (although he brought me a Tribe when I needed one, he being just a few years on the mainland from Hawaii), but kept me from dating ages 20-27, which I desperately needed to do and was afraid to do it. My second marriage was extremely painful emotionally (neither were good sex), but I got to live in London twice, had deep financial resources and privilege, and got two amazing sons, ergo Worth It. The rest of the men? My Big Love, whom I never married but still loves me today? He’s a shitshow I still adore (and saw in September for the second time in 13 years since we broke up, AGAIN), but he’s been so instrumental. We both expressed sadness at not being together at this stage of life (I met him in 8th grade, and he stated “I’m going to marry you one day.”). I guess I’m similar to you. Some of the heartache was what I needed, some were just detritus I should have skipped. But I landed here, where I’m comfortable and secure and happy and independent and retired. It worked out. 🥰
What a journey! Sending you a lot of love